18 February 2012
Your baby's shirt reflects your character
I once found a brand new David and Goliath onesie at a thrift store for $0.75. The front of it read, "I only cry when ugly people hold me." This was funny to me at the time, so I bought it (mostly because it still had the tags and was less than a dollar). When Sam was about a month old, he was wearing it as Brad's grandmother held him for the first time. Then Sam started to cry, and I think I might have really hurt her feelings. I felt like a complete idiot for being so unaware of how my stupid and rude sense of humor could affect someone else, and for allowing that situation to even happen.
Since then I have observed many children in different shirts with supposedly funny sayings on them. I realized that these phrases don't relate to the children at all because the kids don't buy their clothes, dress themselves, or even read. But, these "witty" shirts say a WHOLE lot about the parents. Sometimes I think that people put their kids in shirts with out realizing what it says about them as parents.
For example, I am not sure that moms who put their child in this onesie:
realize that they themselves might as well just be wearing this shirt:
Tonight I saw a photo of an adorable little girl, a little girl with a smart and tasteful mother, sporting a onesie that read:
This made me sad. BEING A MOM IS HARD. It is one of the hardest jobs out there. No other job comes with as much responsibility, stress, fluctuating emotions, decision making, guilt, fear, and second guessing. However, most people in any other job are totally open to tips, advice, opinions, and just general feedback about how to improve themselves. Why can't moms be that way? When did it become a good thing to be so close minded and start villainizing people for trying to share potentially helpful information? If someone tries to hurt your kid or suggests that you do mean and dangerous things to your kid, by all means react defensively. Most people just care about you and your kid and want to offer you suggestions about things that worked well for them because THEY WANT TO HELP...because they have been there and they know that nobody can really do this alone. Why scare people away? What if someone has some really important information that you are unaware of (think formula/toy/car seat/medicine recall), that would help your child...but is to afraid to say something because of your child's "cute" shirt? Are you willing to risk the well being of your child for the sake of your pride? REALLY? Sadly, I know too many moms who do this on one issue or another. "Thanks anyway, but I think I know what is best for MY kid." Do you? I don't! Not all the time, not about every issue!
If you are going to put your child in the onesie pictured above, you might as well just wear a t-shirt yourself that says, "I know everything already and I don't care what you think".
Give people a chance, if their intentions are harmless, and you disagree, then ignore their advice. The "mommy war" is what happens when you strike back with hurtful intentions...not when they approach you with good intentions. :)